#4 - CPU up, and other things...

Hi ho.

My parents finally got the CPU of my desktop upgraded. Yays. P4 2.40 GHz (ha!), 512 MB DDR1 RAM.

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Just as I wrote the above line, this just came in. My dadi died.

Mom just said it. 'Dadi ki death ho gayi.' She seemed in a hurry, and somewhat shaky. I couldn't, or didn't, ask why. My thoughts, at that moment, were vaguely pacifist - something like 'good for her', or more probably, 'Finally.' It wasn't words, so I can't say it; it was essence, I can just describe it. She had a ripe long life, and things were fast getting hard for her. Physical and mental illness and filial apathy were the main elements in her life, from what I could point out.

The last two-three years, she distanced herself mentally, living in a different world only thinly connected with the one we percieved. She heard what others couldn't hear, spoke to people we couldn't see. Her family - three sons apart from my dad - had a stance of indifference and inefficiency in her life. My family, as we went out of our way many times to care for her, was better, but we had our own limitations too. The credit goes to Mom, mostly. She was the one with the concern, doing everything she could while simultaneously keeping up the front in the survival battle.

I wouldn't lie. People may call me indifferent or stone hearted or something, but I don't cry when I hear of deaths, I'm not even sad - just uncharacteristically thoughtful for a while. I shuddered when I heard it, but it had to happen, and, if anything, Dadi is liberated; freed and raised to the next level.

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...and just 80 GB of disk space. Wow. My music collect has expanded to 40 GB, given all the CDs I've been acquiring of late, which means that I can only keep my music on my external HDD.

Anyway, this PC is decent, and it handles Reason just as well as the laptop did, and Ableton just a tiny bit better. Fine by me - of late, I've started prefering Reason a lot more than Ableton. Far lesser mud (aka less CPU intensive), and far better UI. I so hate going through racks in Ableton, and Reason is so much more straightforward with everything. It must have it's pitfalls, I suppose, but it's the best thing for now. Perhaps a keyboard controller could change things, but I only see Reason becoming better with it. I remember I hated the Reason sequencer (Arrangement view and piano roll) when I started using it, being more accustomed to the Ableton one, but now even that feels better, although needs somewhat more fine tuning.

The sole reason (Reason? Yeah, right.) why Ableton is not uninstalled from the PC by now is because it has the Session view and the ability to go DJ with all the clips you make. I wish I could just do all the work in Reason, and then control the playback (for live settings) in Ableton. Hard, unless I decide to bite the bullet and use Ableton as the sequencer and Reason as just an instrument rack, or unless I find another way...and thus, this is up for discussion at Freq20.com. I posted a while back. Waiting to see what happens with fingers crossed and projects in a limbo.

/CGKnight